My Rapture

Happy Rapture. I hope all the non-christians like me are prepared for a world of awesome. A dystopic future of kill or be killed. Tomorrow's weather: Violent, with a chance of dismemberment. The open road calls me, dog at my side, sawed-off shotgun at my side. I will be the Ayatollah of Rock'nRollah.

Last night, I drank the most I have drank in quite some time. A forty, a bottle of wine, and countless beers and mixed drinks. I passed out in my car and vomited in my friend's driveway. It's been a looong time since I vomited while drinking. It was a bonfire at a friend's house. And I had a bombshell dropped on me. Maybe that's why I drank as much as I did. Also, the Rapture.

Everyone has that "what if?" person in their life. That person that it never seemed to work out with, despite how great everything was. That person that moved, and you couldn't do the long distance thing. Or that person that you never got the opportunity to be with because the timing was always off. Mine was that last one. We were roommates for a year, and that's why we never got together, even though we both wanted to. Then, when I was visiting my alma mater, we hooked up. And it was awesome. But, we decided we couldn't do the long distance thing, and she was seeing someone else. She was my "what if?" girl. And I hadn't talked to her since New Year's. So I texted her to see how her life was going. And she told me she's 15 weeks pregnant. Bam! Bombshell.

I hate being that person. The person who dwells on what could have been. But, it rocked me hard. I watched boyfriend after boyfriend mistreat and eventually leave her because she's damaged goods and clingy; but to me, she's beautiful, smart, funny, and incredibly caring. She helped me out of some of the worst feelings of my life. And now, she's pregnant, by some dude I don't know. So, I feel pretty shitty right now, both from the info I got, and from being incredibly hungover. So I'm going to continue to watch TV, possibly mix a bloody mary because those are the greetest hangover cures ever, and maybe watch the Rapture later.

Oh, here's a song: