Friday, December 23, 2011

There is no sense left in my life. I am adrift in an ocean, lost to civilization

Part three of my favorite albums is being pushed back.  A buddy of mine gave me some new music, so I'm re-analyzing my picks for the last part due to some awesome shit I've been listening to.  Won't be too much longer.  I know you're all waiting with bated breath.

I feel like I am nearing the end of my rope.  It could be because I'm wrecked on wine right now, well, wine and Jameson, but this is just getting tedious.  I'm trying to de-puzzle an acquaintance of mine, who has appeared in previous posts, mostly during the summer.  I feel like I've got a chance here, but every time I go in for the kill so to speak, something goes fucking wrong, usually something outside of my control.  She lost her job today, not her fault, they just couldn't keep her on, so she's bummed as hell.  So I missed an opportunity to comfort her last night because I had to fucking work today.  Now, I just want to give her the christmas present I got her, but she's not answering.  Normally, I wouldn't give it two fucks, I'll give it to her eventually, but like I said, I'm wrecked on wine right now, and when I'm wrecked on wine, every pretense of me being a rational human being is gone.  I am a gibbering monster.  I am a insatiable beast of burden, carrying loads of emotional toil through the lifeless desert until I eventually die.  I am the bitter recriminations of life, creeping towards it's own destruction.  I am self-loathing personified.  That is my fate, like the fate of all creatures.  I am the self-doubt that causes you to lock yourself within a cocoon of isolation, emerging a withered husk of your former self.

8 comments:

  1. Hey I'm like that sober. I should be drunk more. It's still not Christmas yet, you got time buddy. It sucks you couldn't be there for her yesterday but one of the points of working is to destroy your social life.

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  2. Hope you're feeling better now.

    Following :)

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  3. Why don't you knock off the alcohol and think rationally? The mind is always clearer when you are sober.

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  4. I love to fill my life with nonsense! :)

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  5. An chay tốt cho sức khỏe của bạn và điệu trị một số bệnh tiểu đường, cao huyết áp, tim mạch, loãng xương, viêm khớp, an chay An chay là an và uống những thứ có nguồn gốc thực vật, không an thịt cá hay thứ có nguồn gốc từ động vật vì liên quan đến sát sinh, giết mổ. An chay hoặc an mặn phụ thuộc vào sự lựa chọn của mỗi người. An chay hiện nay khá phổ biến. Các món an chay dễ làm thường dùng các thức an có từ nguồn gốc thực vật như trái cây, rau củ quả, ngũ cốc, đậu phụ … An chay có thể ngừa được bệnh sỏi mật, sỏi thận, hen suyễn và giảm bớt bệnh tiểu đường ở những người không dùng insulin, do thực phẩm chay chứa nhiều chất xơ giúp cơ thể điều hòa thành phần đường một cách hiệu quả.

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  6. excellent selection +follow, followme ;)

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